Awkward Life Moments – #1

Awkward Life Moments, The Flawed GuruThe other day, I had one of the most disgusting things in my life happen just before I was to take one of my gym classes. That morning I grabbed a cold drink bottle from the fridge, which I do every morning, and polished off half the water as part of breakfast. Healthy, I know!

When I got home after work, 9 hours later, I grabbed the same bottle and took it to the gym. As I usually do, the first thing I did when I got there was to hope on the bike, and at which point I drunk another 1/4 of the bottle. After 15 minutes or so, I jumped off the bike and headed to the group training room and waited outside for the class to start.

That’s when I thought I’d get some fresh water, as a quarter bottle wouldn’t be enough for class, and cold water beats room temperature water any day. So, as you do, I decided to skull the last part of the water, as I hate to tip it down the drain undrunk, and mixing it with fresh cold water never seems like a good idea.

As my mouth filled with the last of the water, I felt something of a decent size come out of the bottle and into my gob. As I stood there with a mouth full of water, wondering what it was, I realized with so many people around me also waiting, that the only thing I could do was to swallow, while trying not to ingest this thing at the same time, because spitting it all out into the fountain would have brought attention to me.

So, I carefully swallowed, and luckily only the water went down, leaving the ‘object’ in between my teeth and cheek. I then proceeded to put my fingers in my mouth, and at which time I pulled out a medium sized live cockroach. I then very calmly turned and placed the unharmed and very much wriggling bug in a pot plant next to the drinking fountain, hoping like hell no one saw me just pull it out of my mouth.

As I watched it wonder off, as if nothing had happened, I began to fill my drink bottle also acting like nothing had happened, though all the time knowing full well there was no way in hell I was going to end up drinking any of that water, as only god and that bug knows how long it had been in there for. I then went into class, and failed miserably to get the thought, and the phantom wriggling in my mouth, out of my brain.

Suffice to say, I am NEVER leaving a flip top drink bottle open ever again!!!

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